Civ Pro Final

6. Mike, a Texas resident, sues his CivPro professor, a domiciliary of Hell, for Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress caused by an exam administered in Texas. The professor files a 12(b)(1) motion for lack of subject matter jurisdiction and a 12(b)(3) motion for improper venue. Assuming that the suit is filed in the Federal District Court for the Western District of Texas, and that you're still paying attention, which of the following is true:

I. The 12(b)(1) motion will not succeed because there is complete diversity, since Hell is a foreign state.

II. The 12(b)(1) motion will not succeed, because a recent bill gives federal courts exclusive jurisdiction over claims of Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress whenever the relevant defendant is one of Satan's minions.

III. The 12(b)(3) motion will not succeed, because nobody cares about things like venue when the last episode of Friends is coming on at any moment.

IV. Neither motion will succeed, but the suit should be dismissed if the professor files a 12(b)(9) motion for Failure to Write A Single Coherent Thought on the Essay Portion of the Exam.

A. I and III
B. II and IV
C. II, III, and IV
D. VII, X, and MCMXLIII

Comments

[Lindsay]

That's the funniest thing I've read this week. And I read the Onion. Granted, it's probably extra-funny since I just took a Civ Pro final.

[Neal]

You failed to capitalize Federal in II, so your motion will fail and you will be sentenced to watch Friends.

[Mr. P]

I suppose I'm obliged to mention this classic.

[Mr. P]

argh - http://www.tamerlane.ca/library/cases/humour/mayo_v_satan.htm

[wingsandvodka]

You rat bastard. Next time you post I'm going to comment with a link to Instapundit linking to whatever you did first. Ha.

[Mr. P]

Hey, yours was independently funny. You just lacked the force of law that comes from a Senate vote.