In what promises to be a weekly or bi-weekly or inter-weekly feature, I endeavor today to answer questions from the ever-enlightening XOXOHTH.com discussion board. Picking up right where the Princeton Review boards left off as the world’s most prestigious pre-law rumor mill, XOXOHTH is constantly a-flutter with thoughtful questions from tomorrow’s 1L’s. Today’s batch:
“What do you wear to a firm reception? An evening reception at a nice restaurant. I would guess like a nice pair of "slacks" and a button-down shirt, no tie[?]”
Before I roll to a firm reception, I’m making literally hundreds of wardrobe calculations: Do I go with one of the thirty-seven suits I have hanging in the closet, or do I have something flown in? Are the goldfish platforms going to get the job done, or do I need to kick it up a notch with the purple and yellow Magic Johnson Converse high tops? Shave the chest, or take the time to wax? Anyone can get a 4.0 and secure a nice appellate clerkship…but having the stones to rock a sharkskin blazer over a skintight, metallic, maroon t-shirt? That’s what I call future partner material.
Everyone is going to be wearing “slacks” and a button-down, this is true. But if everyone were also turning in a résumé printed on double-weight, oxi-bond papyrus, would you do that, too? Probably. But the point is this: Firm receptions are your chance to really outshine your peers. Once the interviews roll around, you will be evaluated alone, without your less-goodlooking classmates nearby for favorable comparison. So, don’t miss this chance. Own it.
“Will I be able to get a job in Texas? I'm a minority at CCN. What are my chances of landing a 125k+ BigFirm job there?”
So, you want to work in Texas, eh? Luckily, you decided to spend a lot of money at a private university instead of coming to UT. Most firms will be impressed by your playing hard to get. In fact, I’d take it a step further and not even send Texas firms your résumé. That kind of snub is sure to pique their interest. They’ll be like, “Who is this fellow who refuses even to request an interview? I say! He must be a prize!” (That is, by the way, exactly how hiring partners at most Texas firms talk. You'll need to get used to that.) You’ll definitely be on your way at that point.
The only obstacle I see is that your choice of law school would be a bit of a liability. You’d be a lot better off if you were coming from, say, Columbia or Chicago, or even NYU. But I guess CCN was the best you could do. It's okay. We don’t choose these things. They choose us.
“Should I wait out the [law school] application storm? [I have a] 3.4/163...should i try to wait it out? How long would that be? Or are things only gonna get worse? How many people plan to wait it out?”
The National Weather Service is currently reporting that the annual number of law school applicants is due to dip back below 120,000 by the year Two Thousand and Fucking Never. Your best option is to put off graduation for another three years and take nothing but phys ed courses in hopes of raising your GPA. But since the top law schools really aren’t going to take anything less than a 4.6/194, I would also consider retaking the LSAT. A 225 would average out with your old exam to reach your optimal target score, and with a little bit of work that could totally be within your range. Or, you could just come over to my house and play XBox. Either way.